What is the matter with people?!!!

Ok, this is a crazy, long rant............but it needs to happen..............

Honestly, who goes to a movie, opening night, to talk to their boyfriend???? Who goes to a movie early, and sits quietly waiting in their seat, only to start diving into food and candy, as soon as their movie starts? Who goes to a movie, with a huge box of Mike & Ike's, and decides that they only like the green kind, so they continue to poor mike and ikes into their hand, pick out the ones they like, and individually drop each candy back into their box, only to repeat this same process over, and over, and over????

I'll tell you who..........it was the moron girl, next to me, in the Dark Knight movie, this weekend. I'm so fed up with idiots. Where do these people come from? It's like their attracted to large groups of people, and they must be where everyone else is. I have a theory............I think movie theatres are like a bug lamp. Every living idiot within a 20 mile radius is attracted to the beautiful bright lights of a movie screen, and they somehow manage to operate a vehicle all the way to that big movie building..........where they can be lulled into an even deeper stupor..........

Also, a couple of weeks ago, me and Pete were in the movie Hancock. Well, the movie fades to black, and a few credits come up. But, about 10 seconds later, a final scene cuts in. Well, the people in front of us were standing and watching the screen. Obviously, since they were standing, we couldn't see. So, Peter says, "sit down". That's it. That's all he said. "Sit down". Because, we deserve to see the movie, right? I guess not. The guy in front of us was freakin' peeved, and he called Pete a couple R rated remarks, and walked off. Why is it Pete's fault that he wanted to see all of the movie he paid for?

I think the normal people in America need to stand up, and fight back!!! Every once in a while, an email will be sent out, about all of the funny warnings on consumer products. A lot of them seem so obvious, that they seem ridiculous or insulting. Like, "Don't use this blow-dryer in the bath tub", a toilet brush that says, "Do not use for personal hygiene", A scooter with the warning "This product moves when used.", A digital thermometer with the advice "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally.", An electric blender used for chopping and dicing that reminds users to "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating." But do you know why these warning labels came to be? IDIOTS!!!!! They are every where. In the days of ancient Greece, they actually had classes on "Common Sense". It's time these classes are reinstituted.



Here are some common sense rules that should be obeyed, and that should be posted at the entrance of every theater. And, maybe they should have them depicted with really easy to understand pictures as well:

1. If a movie is rated PG-13 or stronger, absolutely no babies should be brought in. PERIOD.

2. No cell phones. Don't even pull them out, even if they are on "silent". Cell phones emit something called "light", and this may be distracting for people that came to watch a movie, not to text.

3. After the previews are over, NO TALKING. Not even if you want to tell your boyfriend that you need to get more hair spray at Wal-Mart after the movie.

4. No wiping your buttery popcorn hands off on other peoples legs. (This seems ludicrous, but it's happened to Julie).

5. No chewing gum, with your mouth gaped open.

6. No yelling at the screen. We understand that for people of lower intelligence, that this can be almost impossible not to do, when you are riled up and your emotions are high, but please refrain.

7. No sleeping. If you are too tired to watch a movie, stay home. People shouldn't have to listen to you snore while they are at the movies.

8. No making out. For you wt out there, this is why the cd section at Wal-Mart was invented.

9. No hyena laughing. If you have a laugh that would scare away an angry moose, rent a movie at Blockbuster.

10. No fire crackers or fire works are to be lit during movie. (This will eventually happen to one of us............mark my words).


So, what do you say? Are these requests unreasonable?