South Paw

Balloon Boy

2009-12-23T09:38:00.000-08:00

Balloon Boy's Dad was just sentenced to 30 days in jail. Serves him right.....

Recipe

2009-10-27T21:03:00.000-07:00

Here is the recipe for the Cincinnati Chili, per your request. I have to give credit to Jeanna though. She is the person that was generous enough to share this beautiful recipe with me, and these are her instructions and recipe. Here it is:

Simmer until beef is cooked:

2 T oil

2 lbs beef

1 quart water

Add:

1-6 oz can tomato paste

2 large yellow onions

1-1/2 T vinegar

1 t worcestershire sauce

1 clove garlic

5 bay leaves

2 t cinnamon

1 t allspice

2 t cayenne

1-1/2 T cocoa

Then let simmer for 1-1/2 to 2 hours.

I don't think I've ever used all that cayenne and I don't think I used 2 big onions either. I may or may not have used the allspice, depending on whether I had it on hand or not.

OH....and don't forget salt to taste....I always forget that.

ENJOY!!!!

Cincinnati chili

2009-10-05T19:38:00.000-07:00

Well, I suppose everyone out there has guessed that I was finished with blogging. Oh, contrare! I simply thought that the public needed a good 8 months to refer back to that beautiful pair of shoes. What were people to do, if they got home after a long, tough day, and didn't have those awe inspiring shoes to look at? I understand. Now is something just as inspiring. Above is a picture of a culinary masterpiece. It's called Cincinnati Chili. If you haven't had the chance to try this, I would be happy to post the recipe. It is so dang good! Thanks Jeanna, for bringing this into my life!

I bought new shoes!

2009-04-02T16:34:00.001-07:00

Ok, a new pair of shoes usually isn't that big of a deal. But, I have been looking FOREVER!!!! To be completely picky, plus have a size 14 shoe, is a horrible combination. I was online last week and found these beauties. If you think they look a little familiar, you're probably right...........you've probably seen these.........about 20 years ago. These shoes are a re-make of the Nike Flights from 1989. I completely love these shoes. They are totally nostalgic. I love plain looking clothes and shoes. Plus, I really like the old school looking stuff, like these. I am stoked!!!!

Funny Video

2009-02-23T20:55:00.000-08:00

Sam goes to the dentist on Thursday. Hopefully this isn't a preview....

Sam-isms

2009-02-18T19:06:00.000-08:00

The other day, Julie, Sam, and I were sitting around watching tv. A show came on about this dare-devil guy, that was constantly looking for something crazy and stupid to do. It showed him base jumping off a cliff. The jump went wrong, and he ended up breaking his back. So, the guy got better, and was now into a suit that he would wear, that enabled him to fly really fast along the ground, head first, after jumping off a huge cliff. When he would spread his arms and legs, he would look like one of those flying squirrels. It was actually pretty cool, but totally insane, because the guy has little control over where he is soaring. Any ways....Sam was watching, and he said, "Can I get one of those suits???!!!" To which, Julie and I answered, NO! He instantly replied, very dissapointedly, "BUT I'VE WANTED TO FLY MY WHOLE LIFE!!!!" I lost it. It was hilarious!!! Watch the video below to see what the flying squirrel suit looks like in action.

My Call on the BYU - Utah Game

2008-11-18T20:56:00.000-08:00

These are some stats that I dug up on a couple of sites. See below for my breakdown of the game and my call on who wins the game.

2007

Utah Total Yards - 376 EDGE: BYU
BYU Total Yards - 465

Utah Passing Yards - 212 EDGE: BYU
BYU Passing Yards - 312

Utah Rushing Yards - 163 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Rushing Yards - 153

Utah Points Scored - 25 EDGE: BYU
BYU Points Scored - 31

FINAL SCORE: BYU 17 - UTAH 10

2008

Utah Total Yards - 416 EDGE: BYU
BYU Total Yards - 456

Utah Passing Yards - 243 EDGE: BYU
BYU Passing Yards - 328

Utah Rushing Yards - 173 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Rushing Yards - 128

Utah Points Scored - 36 EDGE: EVEN
BYU Points Scored - 36

Utah Scoring Defense - 16 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Scoring Defense - 18

Utah Defensive Yards/Game - 284 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Defensive Yards/Game - 345

Utah Rushing Defense - 94 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Rushing Defense - 147

Utah Pass Defense - 189 EDGE: UTAH
BYU Pass Defense - 197

It has taken late quarter heroics for BYU to edge Utah in their past two meetings. I would say that BYU was the better team the past two years. This year is different. Not only is Utah undefeated, but they have beaten 3 times as many division one teams with winning records as BYU has. Looking at the statistics above, Utah has the advantage in 3 more categories than BYU. BYU also proved to completely melt down against fast defenses. (TCU Route). On top of that, Utah always seems to come to these games hungrier than BYU. On the other hand though, it seems that Utah escaped with wins in 5 of their games. BYU escaped with a few wins also, but it seems that Utah has had some dang ugly wins on their road to being undefeated so far.

Sadly, I will have to give the edge to Utah in this game. I'm praying for an upset. You never know what will happen in rivalry games. However, my prediction is:

UTAH 30 - BYU 20

I hope I'm dead wrong.............

Julie and I scored small parts in High School Musical 3!!! Check us out!!!

2008-11-16T18:33:00.001-08:00

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Sam

2008-11-09T19:27:00.000-08:00

I was hanging out with Peter and Bruce yesterday. Pete told me something that happened yesterday that totally cracked me up......

Lately, our VCR has been hungry. It's started to eat tapes. The other day, Sam put a tape in of his Grandma Alger's. It was the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie. Unfortunately, the VCR ate the movie and completely tore the tape ribbon in half, so the movie is useless.

So, yesterday Julie and Sam were at her parents house, helping them clean up their yard. I had run out to do the weekly grocery shopping. Any ways, while Julie and Sam were there, Julie wanted Sam to tell his Grandma Alger about the tape. Naturally, Sam wasn't excited about telling his Grandma that her tape was ruined. Julie said, "Sam, tell grandma the bad news." So, Sam said, "Obama Won". HILARIOUS!

I honestly don't know where he gets this stuff. Julie and I haven't really discussed politics in front of him this year, so I'm not sure where he came up with that. This is just another example of the funny kid we have the blessing of having in our family. I love that boy.

The Philadelphian

2008-10-06T20:21:00.001-07:00

A week or so ago, me and some co-workers were standing around talking about food. (It's one of my favorite pass times). One of the ladies that I work with mentioned that there was a great phili place down the road a ways, but she didn't know what it was called and wasn't sure what street it was on. I knew I needed to try it out. So, we had her guides us there today, so we could partake.

Holy Crap!!!! There was a line that went out the door. When you walk in, you have to keep your blinders on, because this place was NASTY!!!! There was grease on the carpet, grease all over all of the fryers behind the counter, grease going up the wall. On the back of the restaurant, along with some nasty tables and chairs, there was a table pushed up against the wall that had a bunch of garbage piled up on it. There were four workers holding down the fort, and it was obvious that there was definitely not a dress code at this place, and it looked like some of these guys had been working for about 12 years, without a break. It was something to behold.

But, as we stood there, it didn't matter, because we were hypnotized by the amount of amazing looking food that they were pumping out. The subs were over flowing with mountains of beautiful cheese stake meat, onions, cheese, mushrooms, etc. It's funny, because me and my friend had never even eaten there, but we just stood there with bubbling excitement as we watched these mountains of greasy delicious food being served. Along with the sandwiches, they also serve fries, onion rings, and fried mushrooms. All of it is FRESH!!! The fries were fresh cut (all be it, they were served out of buckets of water and tossed directly from the buckets into the deep fryer), and the onion rings and fried mushrooms were all hand battered and throw in individually. It was amazing.

I ordered the 12" phili and some onion rings. We all brought the subs back to work to eat them. It's a good thing too, because it took about an hour, because you stand waiting for your name to be read for a LONG time.

This sandwich was life changing. Simply put, it makes you emotional. My friend bit into his, and he made a "scream like" sound in his mouth after he took his first bite. They were that good. My 12" sub had to be like 2 pounds of food. I told my friend here at work, that we needed to start something like a book club, because I just wanted to sit around and talk about the experience. This place would be given zero stars on atmosphere and cleanliness, but a 10 on the food. LOVE IT!!!!!

Dunk Tank / BYU / Tetanus Shot

2008-09-17T13:21:00.000-07:00

Dunk Tank

It's been weeks now since I last blogged. I guess I've felt uninspired lately. Any ways........I thought I'd update everyone on my life in the past few weeks. I got home Friday night, and Sam was bouncing off the walls about going in the dunk tank, at his school carnival. One sign I'm getting old is, I thought in my mind, "I guess I can see why that would be fun for him........." How old am I, where I have to take a step back, analyze, and determine through critical thinking, that, yeah, that could be a fun activity?!!! Oh well, such is life. So, Sam heard at school that day that it would cost each student $5 to be dunked. I think he would have paid $500 if given the chance. Well, the kid just had to dig around the house, and in his room for a few minutes, and voila!!! He had $5. So we went to the carnival, and Sam's hopes were temporarily shattered, because we asked one of the adults if kids were to be dunked, and the adult shot it down. I guess she was mis-informed. So, sure enough, after about an hour of waiting around, and watching Sam literally battle all of the kids in line, to keep his spot, he got to be dunked. (For just $1). He loved it, and I could tell he felt really cool, because after the dunk tank, he instantly took off from us, soaked and dripping from head to toe, to walk around and show off that he had been in the tank. He's a cool kid.

BYU

So, if you follow college football closely, you will know that there are a handful of HUGE bowl games, called the BCS bowls. Schools that make it to these elite bowls are paid handsomely for earning the right. BYU is seeking one of these bowls this year. Last Saturday was one of BYU's biggest tests. We played UCLA at home. It was amazing. We scored on our first drive to go up 7-0. Then we got the ball back, and had to punt it away. I was like, "Why the heck can't BYU ever just pull away from opponent?" I was frustrated. But, to my pleasant surprise, BYU scored again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again. (That's not an exaggeration!) We whooped up on them, and won the game 59 to ZERO! It was truly a beautiful thing to watch. So, now of course, my hopes are way up......I'm hoping BYU can get into a coveted BCS bowl game.

Tetanus Shot

My Mom has been bugging me to go to the doctor for some time now. (You have to appreciate motherly love....) :) I hadn't been in to the doctor for at least 7 years to do a regular check up, so it was probably time. I've also been having these weird pains in my shins for several weeks now, and, being the hypochondriac that I am, it totally worries me. So, I went in, with a long list of things to discuss. It seemed like the doctor had better things to do, as he proceeded to shoot down concern after concern. Any ways, when the visit was over, he said totally randomly, "Hey, when's the last time you had a tetanus shot?" I couldn't remember, so I thought, what the heck. So, I don't know if there are side effects to a tetanus shot, or if I just have a random flu or something, but I have felt like complete garbage since yesterday afternoon, and my arm feels like it was hit by a Mac truck. I like to think I have a high threshold for pain, so I don't think I'm being a baby. Julie would probably disagree. As you can see from the time of my blog entry, I'm at home sick.

Any ways.......that's life for the past few weeks.

FOOTBALL!!!!!!

2008-08-30T20:03:00.001-07:00

My heart is singing right now.........football has begun!!!

The Olympics

2008-08-18T16:56:00.001-07:00

I love the olympics!!! Does it get any better than watching athletes at peak performance, battling for country bragging rights??? Michael Phelps and U.S. Swimming. Anyone who had the oppoortunity to see the Mens 4x100 freestyle relay, cannot deny that this is the best moment of the olympics so far. Simply amazing! As I watched the race, I was laying in bed. Then, I was sitting upright in bed, and then I was hopping up and down on my keester, on my bed, screaming at the tv. Also, Phelps' 100M butterfly win, by 1/100 of a second was another crazy race.

Also, the Men's 100 Meter final was this past weekend. The winner was Usain Bolt, from Jamaica. This race, is basically, "the fastest man on the planet", race. Those guys were cookin'! And, Usain was ahead by so much, that he basically trotted in for the last 10 meters of the race, and he turned to the crowd with his arms outstretched. It was way cool.

Then, there's the U.S. Womens Gymnastics team. Does it get any better to have our girls whoop up on those under aged Chinese Girls??? Yeah, the Chinese have won their fair share of medals this go around, in gymnastics, but our girls have kicked trash. And, Nastia is completely clutch.

Also, (knock on wood), it looks like the mens U.S. Basketball team is on track to finally take back what's rightfully ours. We just beat Germany by 49 points today.

If you're not watching the olympics, you are truly missing out!!!! I can't remember when the olympics were this good!

Julie

2008-08-11T19:53:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow, on the 12th of August, Julie and I will be married 8 years.
She is so perfect for me. At times, I am very sporadic. I can be somewhat of a nervous personality, but she compliments my personality so well. She is so good at doing the little things and saying the little things that make my life so much better. She is truly my anchor! I love my wife! I LOVE YOU JULIE!

Shark Week

2008-07-31T17:37:00.000-07:00

As many of you probably know, the Discovery channel is having "Shark Week" this week. For a solid week, the Discovery Channel will air nothing but shows having to do with sharks. I really like it. I think sharks are fascinating.

The thought occurred to me the other day though - how come we never see a baby Great White Shark? All of the footage is of these monster sharks tearing through meat in the water and reeking havoc. But, you never see a little cute shark, with little razor blade teeth hanging out of its bottom jaw. Why? I think I may have heard once that great white baby sightings were rare.

So, I did a little research, to figure why we never hear of a Great White baby, and I've found out that Great Whites are the devil! Seriously. I used to think that snakes were up there, as the most despicable, disgusting creatures, but now the snake has competition.

I went to wikipedia.org, and I read up on the great white. GET THIS......it says, "Almost nothing, however, is known about how and where the great white mates. There is some evidence that points to the near-soporific effect resulting from a large feast (such as a whale carcass) possibly induce mating." So, in other words, it takes feasting on a carcass the size of a school bus to get a shark in the mood. That's sick!!! These animals are screwed up! Plus, it says that they don't know for sure, but some believe that great whites live to be past 100 years old. Yeah............it's because they've sold their souls!!! Also, with a great white shark, the way the pregancy goes is, there can be up to 40 eggs that hatch inside of the mother. However, only one is actually birthed, because they all end up eating each other, until eventually the strongest is left! SPAWN OF SATAN!!!!

I remember, when I was a kid, I totally loved the movie Jaws. Even though it totally messed with my head whenever I got in the ocean, I still loved that movie. There's one part in Jaws, where the crazy fisherman talks about how he was on the U.S.S. Indianapolis. For those of you who don't know, the U.S.S. Indianapolis was sunk, and 900 sailors were stranded in the water, to wait for rescue. Well, while they waited, I guess sharks just had a hay day on all that live bait. Only 316 sailors were rescued. So, in the movie, the crazy fisherman says, "And, you know, the thing about a shark... he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be living... until he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then..."

That description is so crazy. I'm convinced, even though they are totally fascinating, great white sharks are the devil.........

Depressed

2008-07-27T17:23:00.000-07:00

I just came to a realization. My next stretch of vacation isn't going to come for 5 months. That's 150 days! How did I do this to myself. I have one vacation day, and the day after Thanksgiving planned, to take off. But other than that, I'm going to have to wait until the end of December to have a week off. For the first time in like 9 years, I have planned to take the week of Christmas off, for vacation. But, how am I to get through that huge stretch? How did I oversee this huge stretch? Well, when Christmas comes around, I will probably be grateful, but until then, things could get rough!!!!

What is the matter with people?!!!

2008-07-21T18:58:00.000-07:00

Ok, this is a crazy, long rant............but it needs to happen..............

Honestly, who goes to a movie, opening night, to talk to their boyfriend???? Who goes to a movie early, and sits quietly waiting in their seat, only to start diving into food and candy, as soon as their movie starts? Who goes to a movie, with a huge box of Mike & Ike's, and decides that they only like the green kind, so they continue to poor mike and ikes into their hand, pick out the ones they like, and individually drop each candy back into their box, only to repeat this same process over, and over, and over????

I'll tell you who..........it was the moron girl, next to me, in the Dark Knight movie, this weekend. I'm so fed up with idiots. Where do these people come from? It's like their attracted to large groups of people, and they must be where everyone else is. I have a theory............I think movie theatres are like a bug lamp. Every living idiot within a 20 mile radius is attracted to the beautiful bright lights of a movie screen, and they somehow manage to operate a vehicle all the way to that big movie building..........where they can be lulled into an even deeper stupor..........

Also, a couple of weeks ago, me and Pete were in the movie Hancock. Well, the movie fades to black, and a few credits come up. But, about 10 seconds later, a final scene cuts in. Well, the people in front of us were standing and watching the screen. Obviously, since they were standing, we couldn't see. So, Peter says, "sit down". That's it. That's all he said. "Sit down". Because, we deserve to see the movie, right? I guess not. The guy in front of us was freakin' peeved, and he called Pete a couple R rated remarks, and walked off. Why is it Pete's fault that he wanted to see all of the movie he paid for?

I think the normal people in America need to stand up, and fight back!!! Every once in a while, an email will be sent out, about all of the funny warnings on consumer products. A lot of them seem so obvious, that they seem ridiculous or insulting. Like, "Don't use this blow-dryer in the bath tub", a toilet brush that says, "Do not use for personal hygiene", A scooter with the warning "This product moves when used.", A digital thermometer with the advice "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally.", An electric blender used for chopping and dicing that reminds users to "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating." But do you know why these warning labels came to be? IDIOTS!!!!! They are every where. In the days of ancient Greece, they actually had classes on "Common Sense". It's time these classes are reinstituted.

Here are some common sense rules that should be obeyed, and that should be posted at the entrance of every theater. And, maybe they should have them depicted with really easy to understand pictures as well:

1. If a movie is rated PG-13 or stronger, absolutely no babies should be brought in. PERIOD.

2. No cell phones. Don't even pull them out, even if they are on "silent". Cell phones emit something called "light", and this may be distracting for people that came to watch a movie, not to text.

3. After the previews are over, NO TALKING. Not even if you want to tell your boyfriend that you need to get more hair spray at Wal-Mart after the movie.

4. No wiping your buttery popcorn hands off on other peoples legs. (This seems ludicrous, but it's happened to Julie).

5. No chewing gum, with your mouth gaped open.

6. No yelling at the screen. We understand that for people of lower intelligence, that this can be almost impossible not to do, when you are riled up and your emotions are high, but please refrain.

7. No sleeping. If you are too tired to watch a movie, stay home. People shouldn't have to listen to you snore while they are at the movies.

8. No making out. For you wt out there, this is why the cd section at Wal-Mart was invented.

9. No hyena laughing. If you have a laugh that would scare away an angry moose, rent a movie at Blockbuster.

10. No fire crackers or fire works are to be lit during movie. (This will eventually happen to one of us............mark my words).

So, what do you say? Are these requests unreasonable?

Memory Tag

2008-07-17T16:34:00.001-07:00

I got this idea from Julie's blog, and thought it sounded like fun.
1. Add a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!
2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses.
If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you.

Movie Review

2008-07-14T17:26:00.000-07:00

On the weekend of the 4th of July, Julie and Sam went to Reno to see her niece get baptized. I stayed behind to do stuff with my fam. So, all weekend I had complete freedom to do whatever, whenever I wanted.

So, what did I end up doing? Well, the first thing, obviously, was I went to Tucano's. Tucano's is by far the best restaurant in Utah, maybe even planet earth. After that, Peter (Julie's Brother) and I, went to see a bunch of movies. We saw Hancock, Wanted, Hulk, Kung Fu Panda, and Love Guru. It was great.

I was just thinking, since I've seen so much stuff in the theatre, which never happens, that I should review a couple of these flicks, and maybe grade them. Please know, that I am somewhat of a hard person to please, when it comes to movies. Action movies need to be stellar, for me to appreciate them, and I almost never like animated movies. So, here goes:

Hancock (A-) - This was a totally entertaining movie. For some reason, Will Smith bugs me, because he is always playing a guy who is either saving the world, or beating all odds. He never plays a realistic role. I wasn't expecting much from this one, so I think, since I went in with low expectations, that I was pleasantly surprised. I find that when I go into a movie with very high expectations, that I'm usually let down in a major way. Hancock was hilarious. It did drop a couple f-bombs though. Since almost every movie must contain a twist now, Hancock had a pretty big one in the middle. I did kind of see some of it coming, but it was a good twist. I've heard that with Hancock's twist, that you either like it or you hate it. I really liked it. The end wrapped up nicely, and you walk away feeling pretty good.

Wanted (D-) - This movie was a giant fart in the face. I couldn't believe what an insult this movie was, from beginning to end. Seriously, when this movie ended, I looked over to Pete, in awe, at how ridiculous it was, and hoping that he thought it was as horrendous as I did. Thankfully, he completely agreed. SPOILER ALERT.................DON'T READ ON, IF YOU PLAN ON WATCHING THIS MOVIE (though, I really hope you won't waste your time and money, after I've bashed this movie up and down). The movie is about a normal guy, that gets trained to be an assassin. He has a pathetic life. He works in a cubicle all day, and is shouted at by his nasty boss all day. The only reason why this movie didn't get an F- is because, it had a cool scene where the guy completely tells of his boss, in great fashion. At the end, the main character decides he's going to break into the combine that houses the fraternity of assassins, and kill them all, by himself. So, how does he do it? Rats. Yeah, that's right, freakin' rats! He goes to a grocery store and buys a ton of peanut butter, to attract the rats. Then he attaches an explosive to thousands and thousands of rats. So, he breaks in, releases the rats, and they help him with his job of taking out all of the assassins. At the end of the movie (which should have been called "Curving Bullet", because I swear, they took the idea of making your bullet curve to the extreme), Angelina Jolie curves a bullet around a circular room, and it hits like 15 guys right in the temple as the bullet continues to curve around the room, never slowing down. It was laughable. I can't believe movies like this even exist. I guess, there will always be 13 year old boys that will eat this stuff up, but as for me, I thought it was mind numbing.

The Love Guru (B+) - This movie had some amazing one liners. It really kept me, Pete, and Julie's cousin Dave laughing almost the whole time. This movie had already been out for a few weeks when we went to see it, so there was only about 10 people in the theatre when we saw it. We were laughing so loud and hard at one point, I thought we might get yelled at. Since this is a Mike Meyers movie, there is a lot of crude humor. Over all though, the plot and one liners make this movie pretty good.

This weekend, I will be going on a "birthday date" with Julie. We will be seeing Batman-The Dark Knight. I'm really looking forward to this one.

Just 48 Days!

2008-07-13T18:34:00.000-07:00

For the past 100 days or so, the sporting world has been lacking. Yes, I had the Jazz season to watch, but for so long, I've had to endure a world without football. I log onto espn.com now, and there is almost nothing to look at. The NBA season is done, and all that is left is major league baseball. Don't get me wrong, I can get into post season baseball. But, the regular season is just way too long. The baseball season is over 150 games long!!! So, tell me.....how can any person get interested in a single regular season baseball game???? I mean, you can watch it, and if your team loses, you can just say, well, there's always another 150 more games to try and win. It's lame.

I do have one thing to tie me over for the next month and a half. The summer olympics in Bejing begin in about a month. I love the Summer Olympics!!! Gymnastics, swimming, and track & field can be way cool. It doesn't get much better than cheering for your country to take out some communist country in a competitive event. This year, it should be cool to see Phelps win some more Gold Medals in swimming, for the US of A.

But football! Aww, football. It's the perfect sport. The season is just 16 games long. That means, that each and every week is a completely win or die situation. And you can see it on the field. In sports like baseball or basketball, many players can take a game off. But with football, players can't afford to take too much time off. Every play, players are sacrificing their bodies and pushing their bodies to the limit! It's great.

So, in just 48 days, the sporting world will be beautiful again. The 49ers start another season, and BYU begins a season, where many experts are expecting them to crash the BCS party. Things should be very interesting this season. Bring on the pig skin!!!

Vampires and Jane Austen

2008-06-17T19:41:00.000-07:00

I don't get it. What is the fascination? Why does it seem that every woman on planet earth is completley obsessed with these two topics? I've watched "Pride & Prejudice" and "Becoming Jane". These are too dang long, and very dry! Honestly........those movies can go on for what seems like days and days, and absolutely nothing happens. All you watch, is completely garbled up conversations, and prissy people.

Every vampire movie that I've seen has been disappointing and lame. Why did Bram Stoker curse us with this ridiculous idea of people that suck blood. Who cares?!

So, I ask, why? Maybe I'll never understand the fascination, just like Julie will never understand my, and other guys fascination, with sports.

What happened to my wife?

2008-05-18T21:48:00.000-07:00

Ok, so, as many of you know, Sam spent the last year and a half saving up for a Nintendo DS. Well, on his birthday, he finally got enough money to buy it. With the Nintendo DS came one game........Zelda and the Phantom Hourglass. This was about two weeks ago now, and I can honestly say that it has taken over our family. No, not just Sam's life, but Julie's also!!! She is totally and utterly obsessed with this game. I haven't played one second of this game, but I already know way too much about it. Why? Because Sam and Julie are constantly consulting, arguing, crying, yelling, conspiring, and teaming up over this game. You should see it.....it's pretty funny! Just the other night, I woke up at two in the morning, in my bed, alone............... I could hear weird fighting noises coming from down stairs, and I realized that Julie was still playing that game.........

The next morning, I asked Julie what time she finally went to bed, but she didn't want to answer..........Oh yeah, and guess what..........I'm upstairs again in my bed, at 11 p.m. on Sunday night, alone............ Why? Because Julie is still down there playing. Earlier, when I asked her if she was coming up to bed, she said, "I can't right now.......I'm about to fight the boss". Hilarious. I like to tease her a bit over this, because she is normally not a video game kind of girl, so I thought I'd blog about it........... If you want to see what has taken over the fam, watch this short video below........

Hot Rod

2008-05-15T20:49:00.000-07:00

This is a hilarious clip from my favorite movie lately. It's their rendition of that famous scene from the movie Footloose.

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-05-15T20:38:00.001-07:00

If there are any Utah Jazz fans out there, let me know if you experience my same anxietys...............when Andre Kirilenko takes a shot on the court, do you have the same fear and dread that you did, when you watched the movie Misery, as that crazy lady raised her sledge hammer to break that guys ankles???!!!!

You just want to cringe and cover your eyes.............

Do they love me back?

2008-05-08T18:14:00.001-07:00

In a movie I saw a few years back, called Fever Pitch, there is a scene where the main character, Ben, played by Jimmy Fallon, is talking about some girl trouble that he is having, with a young student of his. Ben is completely and utterly obsessed with the Boston Redsox. He owns season tickets, and every year, baseball consumes several months of his life. Any ways, he is having trouble with his relationship because he won't commit to the girl, like he does to the Boston Redsox. The scene in the movie ends with the boy asking Ben, "You love the Red Sox, but have they ever loved you back?". With this question, Ben gets peeved, and says, "Who do you think you are, Dr. Phil? Go on, get outta here!" It's a pretty funny scene.

The reason I bring up this scene, is because lately, I've been growing more and more disappointed with sports, and I feel that I'm not getting back what I put in. I get so emotionally invested in teams and outcomes, that I think it takes a toll. For instance......last night, as I was watching the Utah Jazz stink it up against the L.A. Lakers, I was FUMING!!! I was so mad, that I actually had visions of myself standing up and hurling my tv remote into our wall.

Why do I do this to myself? Year after year, I will get emotionally invested in a team, only to be let down.

If any of you know me well, you would know that I love sports. I totally love the 49ers, BYU Football, the Utah Jazz, the Oakland A's, and the San Francisco Giants.

If I had to describe what it felt like to someone else, for me to watch my team get taken out of Championship contention, I would have to compare it to watching a puppy in a 5 month race. And, just as this cute little puppy is about to cross the finish line, and take the prize, a Mac truck comes out of nowhere, and completely obliterates the puppy........leaving me with NOTHING!

As you can probably tell by reading this, I'm pretty frustrated. I guess it's because I was so spoiled back in the 1980's and 1990's. The 80's and 90's were amazing, if you were into my teams. Things couldn't have been better. BYU won it's National Championship, the 49ers won 5 Superbowls!!! That's right, 5!!! And, the A's and Giants faced each other in the World Series. Things were great.

I remember one year, in between some of the 49ers Superbowls, that I was watching a 49er playoff game on a Saturday afternoon. The 49ers were knocked out, and I remember actually walking down my street, on Hathaway Court, actually crying, because I couldn't handle my 49ers not winning it all.

But now, I'm left with only memories of when times were good. It's been literally over a decade now, since I could brag about how my team is #1. I can't taste that sweet taste of victory in my mouth any more. I'm left with only a bitter taste, like I just chugged down a gallon of vinegar.

None of my teams have won lately, and there's no light at the end of the tunnel. The Jazz look to get worked by Kobe this year, in the playoffs. It's pretty much an impossibility that BYU could win a National Championship now, because of the BCS, aka "the devil". And, the Giant's and A's are mediocre at best.

So, why do I still hold on? Why do I still care? Why, after so much heart ache, do I still let my heart get sucked into these games and these teams? Should I become a bandwagon fan, and jump on the Patriot train? Or, claim I've always loved the University of Florida?

The answer is, HECK NO!!! I can't do it. I must keep plugging along, and keep hope. Because, hopefully, when one of my teams finally break through again, and win the coveted championship, hopefully, all the pain, tears, sweat, and angst, will all be worth it!!! So, in answer to the question, do the 49ers, BYU, Giant's, Jazz, and A's love me back? They once did....... I guess only the future will tell if they will again................

Pet Peeves

2008-04-23T16:45:00.001-07:00

Everyone has pet peeves, right? Little things that, for some reason, just bug the crap out of you....!

I thought for fun, I'd list 10 of my pet peeves. I'm sure most of us can relate to some of these. They are:

1. I hate it when I go to a fast food place, and they have the ketchup or napkins behind the counter. What the heck?

2. I hate those networks or tv shows that dedicate 99% of air time to either Brittney Spears, Paris Hilton, or Lindsay Lohan. I don't care about these shells of people that are as deep as a puddle. Who cares?!

3. I hate "nothing talk" or "small talk". I honestly want to throw up when I hear people talking about nothing. I understand that sometimes small talk is necessary to break the ice, but people that talk about nothing all day really bug.

4. I hate political correctness.

5. I hate NASCAR. It's not a sport. It's an excuse for w.t. to get together and eat moon pies and bbq and scope on relatives.

5. I hate it when professional athletes think they are a god, just because they can throw a ball well or shoot a ball accurately. Give me a break.

5. I hate Utah drivers. As soon as a drop of rain hits the ground, or if a cop just happens to be parked on the side of the freeway, everyone MUST decelerate to 35 mph. UHH!

6. I hate cats. They give nothing back. They shed. And, they are snobby. Say what you will, but cats are like a stuck up hot chick. They just put their noses in the air at you, even if you are the one feeding it and providing it shelter.

7. I hate the Disney Channel. If I wanted cheese, I'd order a pizza.

8. I hate it when I make reservations at a restaurant, and then I get there and they make me wait a while for my table.

9. I hate it when, on the road, people get all peeved when you quickly tap your horn at them, because they have failed to notice that the light has turned green. It's not my fault you suck.

10. I hate the style of "emo's". You know those guys, that are like 70 pounds, and wear pants that are skin tight from the waist down to the very bottom. They try to look all grungy, with messed up hair. When, really, they've paid hundreds of dollars to look like a dumpster just spat them out. What a joke.

Just One Week

2008-04-21T18:46:00.000-07:00

Can I just say what a difference one week makes?! This past week, I took the week off. I had almost nothing planned, and I was excited about that. We did a bunch of low key things, and ate out a few times, but for the most part, my last week was pretty slow paced.

I didn't really spend many late nights up, trying to make the most out of each day of vacation. But, I went to bed at a decent hour, and slept in until about 8 or 9 every morning. This morning, even though I was coming into work for the first time in 10 days, I felt great!!! I can't remember the last time I felt that good at work. I felt refreshed, alert, and I was happy!

A lot of times, we tend to think, when we take a vacation that something grandiose needs to be planned or scheduled. This is completely over rated. I did nothing all week, and it was everything I ever thought it could be. Man, being lazy has its advantages!!!

Results

2008-03-25T19:46:00.000-07:00

The results, were:

1. Carls, 2. Arby's, 3. McDonalds, 4. KFC, 5. Wendy's, 6. Burger King.

Carls Jr. was the most expensive, so I guess sometimes you get what you pay for.....

And the winner is......

2008-03-19T16:52:00.000-07:00

Right now, with Lent going on, a bunch of the big fast food chains are trying to push fish sandwiches on the public. (Never underestimate the greedy little minds that run corporate America). Today at work, my friend comes over to my cubicle, and tells me about how him and a bunch of his friends decided to do a fish sandwich survey. They all split up last night, and got a fish sandwich from McDonalds, Arby's, Burger King, Carl's Jr., Arctic Circle, KFC/A&W, and Wendy's. Then, they had a non-taster divide up the sandwiches into six portions. I don't know the total rankings from 1 through 6, but I do know that KFC/A&W received the #1 nod, with Arctic Circle coming in at #2.

When my friend told me about this, I thought it was both hilarious, and freakin' cool. So, of course, I wanted to be part of the madness. I convinced 3 of my co-workers to do a chicken sandwich survey with me. 3 of us would taste the sandwiches and make our assessments, and the fourth person would do the preparation of the sandwiches, to ensure anonymity.

Of course, some parameters needed to be discussed before we set out to comb the town for different chicken sandwiches. There are many different types of chicken sandwiches out there. I.e. the spicy chicken, the crispy chicken, the chicken club, etc. So, we decided that the sandwich needed to be the "standard crispy chicken" sandwich that each restaurant offered.

So, we split up and got crispy chicken sandwiches from McDonalds, Arby's, Burger King, Carl's Jr., Wendy's, and KFC/A&W.

When we arrived back at work with our assigned sandwiches, we handed them over to a girl that wouldn't be involved in the taste testing. This was necessary, as we couldn't allow our results to be skewed. She divided them up and numbered each one.

It was interesting to see how each of us went about ranking each of our test sandwiches. Some of us tasted just part of each sample, while others decided to eat the entire portion of each sample sandwich, before judging on the quality. As for myself, I ate about half of each subject sandwich, ranked each one by number, and then ate the other half later, and then ranked them again. Then, I combined the rankings on each sandwich, and averaged out the score.

Well, needless to say, some were great, while others were completely and utterly abysmal!!! Also, they ranged greatly in price and toppings. This is how they break out:

McDonalds - about $4.

Arby's - about $3

Burger King - about $3

Carl's Jr. - about $4.50

KFC/A&W. - $4.50

Wendy's - $1

Some sandwiches were laden with much more tasty characteristics, such as bacon, or a wheat bun, while others were very ordinary or "cafeteria-esque".

What's your opinion? Look over to the poll I have set up, and let me know which chicken sandwich you think you would enjoy the most.

I'll post again at the end of the poll to let you know the results from our poll.

ADHD or Just Six?

2008-03-04T16:18:00.000-08:00

Julie and I were talking about Sam today. A while back in a parent/teacher conference, Sam's teacher mentioned that we may want to have Sam tested for ADHD. Apparently, Sam can give his teacher "a run for her money" on occasion. So, I guess at this point Julie will have him tested.

I have a couple concerns about this. First, I think it can't hurt to get a professional's opinion on the matter, so we'll most likely have him tested. But, I worry that sometimes kids can be diagnosed with ADHD or Hyper Activity too easily. I do understand that ADHD is an issue that would need to be dealt with, but I wouldn't want Sam to have his life dramatically changed if this was just a case of Sam acting like a typical, rambunctious kid.

When I look back to when I was a kid, I can remember acting like a total dork all of the time. (Well, maybe I still do). But, I remember constantly getting booted out of primary because I couldn't be quiet or reverent. I also remember getting like 20 checks on the blackboard, one day at school. I think it's normal for kids to act out and vie for their friend’s attention. I was always doing stuff that was completely out of control, but I really don't think that I paid a price for this and that my education or learning was hampered too badly because of this behavior.

I guess we'll just have to play it by ear, and decide what we'll need to do if something does come up with the test.

Tuesday's

2008-02-19T16:20:00.000-08:00

Every Tuesday night, Julie has to go work at the American Fork Rec. Center for about 3 hours. She gets paid almost nothing for this work. I think that's what makes it so crappy that she has to go and work. We are getting almost no reward for not having a wife or mother here on Tuesday nights. Unfortunately, we think its probably necessary that she keeps the job with the Rec., because when Julie's "real" job is over, come summertime, it will be nice to have another job to fall back on when that one is put on hold for the summer.

So for now, every Tuesday, Sam and I stare at each other for about 3 hours while Julie is gone. I can't imagine what it would be like if I had a job that forced me to travel on a regular basis or what it would be like to be in the military. I miss my wifey. I'm a stinkin' weakling...........

Happiness

2008-02-18T11:58:00.000-08:00

A while back, I was listening to a guy on the radio. He was talking about things that make us happy. He made some funny comments about how seeing your neighbor fall of his roof makes a man happy. It makes a man happy because he's glad it wasn't him that fell off the roof. I thought that was hilarious!

Well, I didn't see anyone fall of the roof today, but I did get a hair cut. What is it about getting a hair cut that makes you feel so dang good?!!! Seriously, when I have my nails cut short, my face shaved, a new hair cut, and a shower - things are PERFECT! Does it get any better than this? That's what Heaven will be for me...........a brand new hair cut (that lasts forever), clean shaven, showered, watching a movie with the family, with a huge platter of crab legs sitting in front of me.

Check out my new trim..........

mmm mmm MMMMMMM!!!!!

2008-02-11T17:56:00.000-08:00

Ok, this picture doesn't really do the real thing justice. Chili's has a new burger out, with bacon as thick as a small paperback book, and a huge patty. Why am I telling you about this??? Because this burger changed my life!

On Friday night, I was at the local Chili's in American Fork, completely unaware and oblivious of the fact that my life was about to change FOREVER. I ordered the Southern Smokehouse Bacon Big Mouth Burger. Then, instead of having the usual fries for my side, I decided to substitute in some grilled mushrooms and peppers. I piled the side onto my burger, and poured ranch and bbq sauce all over it. This burger transcended all expectation and all reason in my mind. I couldn't even process how good this was.............I nearly had a stroke with joy.

For any of you reading this blog...........GO! Stop reading, and make way to your local Chili's.

Issues

2008-02-06T16:38:00.000-08:00

Ok, so by now most of you know I have issues.................Like I mentioned in my last blog- I have to wash my hands entirely too much. In Julie's blog, she talked about how I literally made myself sick with worry when looking at "The World's 10 Deadliest Insects" book the other day. Also, have I mentioned the fact that randomly my muscles shrivel up like an old man in a freezing cold shower............???? Yeah..........I'm not sure why, but I get cramps in my right hand almost daily. Randomly, the side of my right hand will just suck in until you can literally see a dent in my hand. It's pretty gross. Also, the other day, I was kneeling down for family prayer and I got a cramp in the back of one of my thighs, so I shot up to my feet to fight the cramp, but the cramping spread to my other leg also, and then to the front of my legs as well. So, both of my legs, front and back were all cramped up............I felt like a complete dork trying to balance on these two legs of mine that were clenched so tight that it felt like I was on two stilts. After this episode, I rushed over to our fruit bowl and totally gormandized two bananas.

So, I'm thinking that these cramping episodes can only be one thing. I really don't drink water. My liquid sustenance pretty much consists of Dr. Pepper and some other soft drinks. I figure that these sodas are like 70% water, right? That's not bad, right??? I do drink a little water during my morning ritual before I leave for work, and then as I go to bed at night, I'll swig a little water before retiring to bed.

I have to say though, that after the leg cramps the other day, I've made more of an effort to drink water, and I force down bananas when I can to help my body with a little potassium. I really don't enjoy water that much, unless it's freezing cold. Oh yeah, have I mentioned that when I eat banana's, sometimes I'll get this weird tingling sensation in my eyes. I think I might literally be allergic to bananas. Maybe I'm allergic to healthy food. For any of you that have seen Back to the Future, there's a part at the end where Doc is throwing a banana peel and some beer into his Delorean to help it run. Why can't my body be like that? It pretty much already is, but I guess these random cramps are my body's way of telling me to shape up, or at least do a better job at treating it right. Maybe I should listen a little closer...............

Enough Already!!!

2008-02-04T17:00:00.001-08:00

Ok. I'm going to say it. I freakin' hate winter. Is it just me, or have we been in the middle of a storm now for about 10 months??? This morning I went out to my car to leave for work. It's bad enough that I have to get up at the butt-crack of dawn, while it's still dark, to get ready for work. But, I have to go out into the frozen tundra in front of our townhome, and scrape away sheets of thick ice from my car. Anyone that knows me well, knows that it takes about 150 gallons of water to clean my body, and get me through my daily rituals of getting ready for the day. First, I wake up, relieve myself, and wash my hands. Then I spray water all over my clothes before I throw them into the dryer. This serves as my iron. (My clothes look like I've pulled all of them out from under one of our couch cushions before I "iron" them in the morning, because we have two considerably sized mountains of clothes that sit behind our couch constantly). Then, I brush my teeth. Then, I jump in the shower. Then I get out, put on some of my clothes, and then I wash my hands again. (This is because I've thought about it, and your hands aren't clean when you get out of the shower. Say what you want, but your hands are in gross places while in the shower). Then, I get fully dressed, and head down stairs. I will soak my hands and rub my face several times until my face is completly wet. I don't know why, but I find this very refreshing. Once my face is wet, I will get my hair completely wet again, so I can style my hair into it's irresistable "George Clooney" look. So............after I've basically taken two showers and washed my hands two or three times, I will trudge out into the tundra to scrape off my car. Needless to say, this is not fun, and very cold. I freakin' hate it.
So, my question is, when is it going to warm up again? When will I be able to walk out and get the mail again, without feeling the need to all out sprint to my mailbox because of sheer survival skills kicking in??? Will I ever be able to use my barbecue again? What does the sun really feel like? One day I'll know.....until then, I guess I'll just have to tell stories of what the sun was like to Sam....

Monday

2008-02-01T14:09:00.000-08:00

Mondy will be a sad, sad day. It marks the end of a beautifull season. As many of you know, the Superbowl will be played on Sunday night. Even though this game has two teams that most people couldn't care less about, it's still the biggest game of the year in American sports, by far!

Come Monday, football will be gone for another 7 months. The anticipation gets so great in August when Football is coming back. Can any of you imagine what it would be like to have a hobby or love that you were forced to go without for over 200 days of every year??? It's not cool.

So.........don't worry about me wearing black over the next month. I'll get over this, like I am forced to do, every year.

Friday

2008-01-31T18:36:00.000-08:00

I have tomorrow off. I'm so excited, I had to tell the world!!!! WOOOHOOO!!!! I don't have any plans, other than to hang out with Julie and Sam tomorrow, and take Julie on a date, just the two of us. It's going to be a great weekend.

Nasty

2008-01-29T17:20:00.000-08:00

This one's for you Julie. This should make your day..................

Politics

2008-01-21T20:43:00.000-08:00

Is it just me, or are politics this time around a lot more interesting than normal? I don't know......maybe I'm finally growing up or something, but things just seem a lot more interesting now. From the primary, to delegates, to everything else. It's crazy! We quite possibly could have an African American president, a woman president (Satan's Lap Cat), or an LDS president. Things are definitely intriguing these days. I honestly feel like these elections could carry more and more weight as times keep changing. In a world where male and female roles are being challenged, boundaries with the family are being questioned, and moral questions are being debated, politics are going to be so vital to how things develop.

A month or so ago, I watched part of a debate on tv between some of the candidates. A question was asked about whether the candidates believed EVERYTHING that is in the Bible. It was interesting to see how the candidates answered that question.

I've never been one to preach about politics. I don't claim to know anything near what I need to know to even suggest a candidate to vote for, or anything like that. But, I do know that things are getting interesting! Just an observation......

The 90's

2008-01-15T20:07:00.000-08:00

At my work, there are two guys that I talk with a lot. They are both musicians. They are always talking about music, bands, instruments, etc. They are both about two years younger than me, so they grew up in essentially the same era that I did. One of these guys is always saying how the 1990's brought the best music to the world than any other era.

Well, maybe I'm naive. Or, maybe I'm completely uneducated or uninformed, but I agree.... The 1990's were superior!

Now, of course everyone will be biased about their era of music. This is because, music from our child hood or from when we're young can bring back some sweet memories and feelings that no other music or media can. So, how can we really judge what music is better? What music was superior to another? Maybe we can do this by asking the question, what would happen if this band or era of music were to simply, no longer exist? Or, would the world be changed, or even notice if this band never had the hits that they did? Or, did that era even effect future era's?

People who grew up in the 1960's will rant about how the Beatles owned music, or explain how Elvis was the founder of "real" rock and roll. People that grew up in the 1970's will explain how Kiss, the Beegee's, or even Stevie Wonder were where it's at. But let's face it, the song Superstition by Stevie Wonder, although a catchy little tune, didn't do anything for the development of music as we know it today.

The 1980's are a completely different animal. With the majority of music being ruled by electronic keyboards and synthesizers, how could you even compare the two era's of the 80's and 90's? With the exception of some 80's bands like Guns 'n Roses and the Beastie Boys, how can you even compare the 80's to the 90's?

I came across a music montage online that was supposedly trying to sum up the 80's in 6 minutes. In the song were some good songs. The artists that were in the song were Bryan Adams, Van Halen, the song from Breakfast Club, Flash Dance, a-ha, Quiet Riot, Twisted Sister, The Scorpions, Michael Jackson, Duran Duran, Madonna, Blondie, Queen, David Bowie, Dire Straits, Bon Jovi, Yes, Soft Cell, The Buggles, B-52's, and A Flock of Seagulls. These pretty much sum up the 80's, right? ....A whole bunch of electronic music, coupled with hilarious lyrics............right? Ok, maybe I'm missing some others, like Lauper, the Petshop Boys, and Culture Club. 80's hair bands and butt rock have a special place in my heart, but the 80's, in my opinion, were just too crowded by bands like Duran Duran and a-ha to hold too much credibility. So, with this I ask the question.....what would happen if all of these bands fell of the face of the earth before they pumped out their hits???? What influence did the 80's have on music today?

So, on to the 90's. What a blessed time!!! This is when music got back to it's roots, but also did things a little better and a little louder. U-2, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Metallica (they rocked in the 80's, but also in the 90's, so I'm counting them for the 90's), Jewel, Fiona Apple, Korn, etc. I can look back to this era, and there really aren't a lot of bands or songs that I liked from the 90's that I should be embarrassed by. Some songs like Sir Mix A Lot, or Vanilla Ice are really corny, but still awesome to this day. The 90's have stood the test of time, and are still rockin' the radio waves, and there are so many bands now that found their inspiration from bands like Nirvana, Metallica, Nine Inch Nails, and Korn.

So, am I wrong? Am I off base? Plead your case. Let me know what you think. And, please don't be offended if I insulted your favorite band........if you liked Culture Club, you deserve a little razzing........ :)

The Evil Eye

2008-01-02T19:33:00.000-08:00

Homeowner

2007-12-29T18:48:00.001-08:00

I really shouldn't complain about it, but I need to vent. Being a Homeowner has so many advantages. For example, walking around in my skibby's at any hour of the day is HEAVENLY!!! Waking up whenever I want is great!!! Also, deciding when I'm going to clean is great too. Also, nothing beats coming home after work to your own home. There's just something to be said about having your very own sanctuary.

BUT.............doing maintenance on your home SUCKS!!! I'm freakin' sick as a dog the last few days. I have a headache, my throat is buggin', and when I smile too big, it feels like my lips could literally split in half because they are so chapped. On top of this, our tub is leaking. I know this because our floor has two black spots by the tub, which leads us to beleave that our tub is leaking water onto the floor boards under our linoleum. So, today, despite my nasty cold, I have to lay on the bathroom floor, along with who knows what else from little Sammy's trips to the bathroom, and re-caulk our bathtub, so the leaking will stop.

Just for the fact that I have a house to repair, I shouldn't complain. Life could be much, much worse. :)

Sa-weet Website!!!!

2007-12-15T17:54:00.000-08:00

When I was a kid, I religiously watched Punky Brewster and Silver Spoons. I remember watching Punky Brewster EVERY day after school. Julie's show as a kid was Little House on the Prairie.

Inevitably, after several great seasons, just about every show will try something in desperation, to bring the ratings back up, and bolster up new watchers.

For any of you out there that watched Happy Days, there was an episode several seasons in, that "The Fonz" was water skiing (in his leather jacket of course),came upon a shark, and jumped over it, while skiing.... Well, needless to say, that's pretty lame. Because of this ridiculous sequence of events in that episode, 40 years later a website has been built, called "Jump the Shark."

Some shows are considered good enough to have never "Jumped the Shark". But most, unfortunately, have fallen victim to ratings desperation. On Silver Spoons, the main character , Ricky Schroder, went through puberty and became "Rick". Punky Brewster however, is considered to have never "jumped". For Julies show, Little House on the Prairie, it jumped when the Ingles moved to the city.

From same character/different actor, to a birth or death, to a new kid in town, many shows eventually fall. If you're curious to see if your childhood show ever "Jumped the Shark", check out this website at:

http://www.jumptheshark.com/index.jspa

Reading

2007-12-12T21:03:00.000-08:00

This is what I am privileged to see of Julie, about half of my life - the top 40% of her face. Doesn't this picture look like the Girl From Limberlost? (One of the books Julie read about a week ago). My wifey is reading CONSTANTLY! Sometimes I'll be laying in bed with her, and I'll want to talk with her about something, and she'll tell me to wait until the book is done, because there is only a couple pages left. Well, one day she pulled this on me........so I agreed to give her some space. The next thing I knew, I looked over, and she was into another book already. THE BRAT!!! How can someone do this? When I finish a book, I have to sit and relish in the fact that I've actually read something over 100 pages. I also have to discuss it with someone, because I'm so proud of myself.

At Thanksgiving, Me, Julie, Carrie Minert, and Jeff Minert sat around my parents kitchen table, and discussed books that we've read, and books that we loved or hated. It's funny, because when Julie and Jeff were talking about books they enjoyed, Carrie and I were talking about how difficult it is for us to actually complete a book. It really doesn't matter how good a book is, I'm still going to look at the last page to count how many pages I have left. When I close the book I'm reading for the night, I always look at where the bookmark is at, to gage how much I have left to read. Why is this? Am I missing the point? Is it a Johnson thing to be so inpatient with reading? Maybe it's just a personality thing. When I read, even if I'm entertained, it still feels like somewhat of a chore. Is my imagination not vivid enough to really enjoy the book? Am I a dullard, because I don't get enveloped in a story?

A stand up comedian that I love, Jim Gaffigan, talked about how he was always so proud of himself for finishing a book. He said that he'd find ways to work it into conversations. He also jokes about how "readers" always say in a snooty tone........."the book was much better than the movie". Then he says, "You know what I enjoyed about the movie? No reading". I can totally relate.

I guess Julie finds escape and fun in reading though, like I do in Football and watching sports. I guess, to each his own............

Love ya Julie........ :)

White Elephant

2007-12-05T18:23:00.000-08:00

Every year, my work has a "White Elephant" gift exchange. Normally, I get something really cheap and lame. This year, however, I decided to give one lucky co-worker an amazing treat. I've enlarged, autographed and framed the picture to the left. Yeah, I know, it could be too much...........but that's just the kind of guy I am. :)

The Video is working now............See below

2007-12-03T19:19:00.001-08:00

My Top 25 Movies of All Time

2007-12-03T17:31:00.000-08:00

1. SHAWSHANK REDEMPTION
2. GROUNDHOG DAY
3. PEEWEE’S BIG ADVENTURE
4. SANDLOT
5. ROCKY 3
6. ROCKY 4
7. DUMB AND DUMBER
8. OFFICE SPACE
9. TOMMY BOY
10. NAPOLEON DYNAMITE
11. JERRY MAGUIRE
12. BACK TO THE FUTURE
13. THE FUGITIVE
14. DIE HARD 1
15. MATRIX
16. FERRIS BUELERS DAY OFF
17. ACE VENTURE – WHEN NATURE CALLS
18. PRINCESS BRIDE
19. LAST SAMURAI
20. NACHO LIBRE
21. CINDERELLA MAN
22. THE ROCK
23. CHRISTMAS STORY
24. SO I MARRIED AN AXE MURDERER.
25. BREWSTERS MILLIONS

Another Hilarious Video (Clean)

2007-11-29T16:49:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving

2007-11-27T19:14:00.000-08:00

This week, I thought I'd talk about things I appreciate and love in life. So often, I can tend to complain about things and dwell on the stupid little things that really don't matter, so here's a list of things I love:

I'm so thankful for my wife, Julie. What a beautiful person she is!!!! She is such a blessing in my life. She is truly the best thing that has ever happened to me. Heavenly Father has blessed me so much more than I am deserving.

I'm thankful for Sammy! He is a good kid, and I don't understand how he turned out this way. It must be because of Julie. He makes me want to be a better person.

I'm grateful for a warm, comfortable home. What a blessing it is to have a refuge from everything. On a long day, it is awesome to be able to come home, to a place I can call my own and relax with my family.

I'm grateful for the Gospel of Jesus Christ. What a blessing it is to have guidance in this chaotic world. To have a blueprint for myself and my family to be able to live together forever.

I'm so grateful for humor! It can easily lighten most burdens. Nothing feels better to me than laughing so hard that I cry hysterically. It's not as often as I'd like, but when it happens, I feel like a million bucks!! Anyone that knows me well, knows that I can sometimes act ridiculous..........

I'm so grateful for my family. This Thanksgiving, we had the opportunity to spend a lot of time with my family, and Sam had the chance to get to know his cousins a lot better. What a blessing it is to have support from them. Not everyone is shown in these pics, but you get the idea......

I'm also grateful for sports. Some people see this as boring or unnecessary, but I love it! The buzzer-beater, the last second hail-mary, and the bottom of the 9th home run. All awesome!!!

There have been times in my life where things have come into focus - when things are clear, and all of the lame things that I tend to complain about or let consume my thoughts are pushed to the side, and I realize what is really important. I hope that I can be a grateful person more often! It seems that the happier people that I've known are grateful for their blessings and have put the truly important things in the forefront of their lives. I hope I can do this more now and in the future.

Save any room for dessert???

2007-11-15T18:14:00.000-08:00

I thought today I would discuss one of my favorite things in life: FOOD! I love food way too much!!! And I don't care. I don't care that I eat my favorite foods until I'm physically ill. I don't care that I drink way too much soft drinks, and I don't care that I'm completely addicted to fast food. Kevin James aptly described the party that he has in his head when he's sitting in a restaurant and he sees the food that he ordered coming his way. THAT IS ME!!!

So, why the obsession? I don't know. I could blame it on the fact that the security my parents put in place over the good food in the house would rival most missile silos. I could blame it on my compulsive personality. But why? Why not just call it as it is...........DEEP LOVE AND ADMIRATION.

So, in honor of my second love today, the first being my wife, I'm going to leave you with a tribute that I made up. If you've ever watched the sound of music, than you'll recognize this. To get the full effect, you need to read below to the tune of "My favorite things". Hope you enjoy!

Sprinkles on cookies and frosting on cupcakes
Hot mashed potato's and big, fat new york steaks
Huge "Secret Santa" plates tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored pudding and warm bear claw strudels
Pasta shells, pickles(dill) and soy sauce with noodles
Good waiters that fly with my order on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Huge bowls of chips with assorted dips and ranches
Family members that stay out of my secret food stashes
Steamed, sweet king crab legs and hot onion rings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the pants are tight
When the food bill stings
When the cupboards look sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad.

www.mattthoughts.gov.www/mattthoughts

2007-11-14T21:26:00.000-08:00

If any of you out there are avid fans of the show "The Office", than you would know what the title of this blog means. In short, on the show The Office, there is some really creepy old man, named Creed. He used to be homeless, and is clearly not right in the head. In one episode, Creed mentions that he's totally going to blog his findings about an office romance between Jim and Pam. Ryan mentions that he set up a "blog" on Microsoft Word for Creed, and he titled it: www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts. Ryan mentioned that even for the Internet, Creeds thoughts were very disturbing. He didn't set up a real blog, because he was truly trying to protect the public. Freakin' funny!!!

I guess I can kind of relate with this. It's amusing to me that disturbed people, like yours truly, can have a medium like a blog, to spread the insanity............ I totally look forward to blogging now and hearing from everyone.

By the way, if you're wondering what that picture at the top of this post is about, that was me when I saw that someone actually visited my blog...........

Well, it's getting late. Gotta go..........

You stay classy Utah County.............

Cow Bell - This is HILARIOUS!

2007-11-14T19:49:00.000-08:00

Rocky

2007-11-13T21:11:00.000-08:00

Most people can remember "THE" movie of their childhood. For Julie, it was Goonies. She can quote pretty much any line at any point in that movie. When we think back to those movies, nostalgia can roll in, and all can seem right for a moment. Besides Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, I would have to say that Rocky is "THE" movie............my movie. I remember popping in Rocky III into our VCR, between shouts from my Mom to fetch her purse for her, and constantly watching the very beginning of that movie, where Rocky manages to stand up on the 10th count of his epic battle with Apollo Creed, narrowly becoming the Heavyweight Champion of the World.

Agree or disagree with me, but I believe Rocky I through Rocky IV represents everything that's still right in the world. Yes, the Rocky movies rank high in the "cheese factor" ratings, and yes, at times are very unrealistic, but then again, so do the movies "It's a Wonderful Life", "Rudy", and "Neverending Story", but what warm-blooded American can honestly say that any of those aren't beautiful?

Below are my top 7 reasons why Rocky serves as a beacon of hope and stands tall as a guiding light to all who will listen to it's prolific war cry, "Gonna Fly Now":

1. Rocky doesn't win every fight. No, Rocky gets the crap beat out of him on different occasions. But he keeps coming back for more, never to give up.

2. Rocky is as dumb as a bag of hammers. HOWEVER...............he still succeeds because he has surrounded himself with people who care about him and love him.

3. SPOILER ALERT!!!! In Rocky IV, Rocky beats the crap out of Ivan Drago, a Russian. What is better than to see this perfect symbol of communism get it handed to him on a platter?

4. Rocky wears red, white, and blue shorts. Very patriotic.

5. Rocky is married, and he is faithful to his loving, yet very awkward wife.

6. There are hilarious one liners all through the Rocky movies, such as, "When I'm done with you, you're going to eat lightning and crap thunder!!!"

7. He's always the underdog. Who doesn't root for the underdog, especially when they're severely mentally handi-capped, like Rocky?

ALL HAIL ROCKY BALBOA!!!

Who doesn't completely love popping in their own personal timeless classic into the vcr or dvd player to allow themselves an hour and a half of nostalgic bliss and relaxation?

Well, until next time.............Good night, and stay classy Utah County.